Rodents with Guitars

A rocking and rolling role-playing game by Andrea Rick (CuriousCat)

Version 1.0,

It’s the Rodent Records Guitar Band Battle!

You’re going to give the greatest show the world has ever seen and win absolutely epically.

Two things:

  • You have a plan for a complex show that requires precise timing and excellent teamwork.
  • You are goddamn rodents.

You need:

  • 2-6 players and 1 GM
  • Some dice (D6 to play; D6, D8, D12 to pick from lists during setup)
  • Something to note your character details and keep track of your ever-shifting stats
  • Appropriate safety tools (e.g. X-card, lines & veils, open door, and/or CATS).
Drawing of a rodent rock band. A rat in a jean vest with studs and band patches is front and center. The rat strikes a pose with their electric guitar that is connected to a 'Bad Rat' amp. To the left is a porcupine singing into a microphone. In the background on the right is a singing capybara behind a drum kit.

Part 1 ‐ For everyone

1 ‐ Character Creation

Roll 3D6 to determine your descriptor, your instrument, and your rodent type.

Descriptor

  1. Exhaustedly cranky
  2. Relentlessly cheerful
  3. Unexpectedly glamorous
  4. Irresistibly attractive
  5. Profoundly inexperienced
  6. Surprisingly sneaky

Rodent Type ‐ Skills

  1. Hamster (store/carry things in your cheek pouches)
  2. Rat (eat anything and not get sick)
  3. Capybara (make friends)
  4. Beaver (chew through anything, swim)
  5. Porcupine (poke around, hurt others in defense)
  6. Flying Squirrel (climb, jump, stagedive)

Instrument

  1. Guitar
  2. Bass
  3. Drums
  4. Vocals
  5. Keyboard
  6. Violin

Names and pronouns

Name your rodent and give it some pronouns

Bonus ‐ Band T-Shirt

If you want your rodent to wear an awesome band t-shirt, roll 1D12.

  1. The Rat Kennedys
  2. Guns N’ Rodents
  3. Joan Ratt and the Blackpaws
  4. The Beaver Boys
  5. Dolly Pawton
  6. The Chinchilla Underground
  7. Siouxsie and the Hamsters
  8. The Grateful Rat
  9. Nine Inch Tails
  10. Capybabes in Toyland
  11. Indigo Squirr’ls
  12. Linkin Paw

2 ‐ Band Creation

Roll 3D6 to determine your band’s music style, gimmick, and problem.

Music Style

  1. Metal
  2. Pop
  3. Punk
  4. Folk
  5. Country
  6. Experimental

Gimmick

  1. You all wear dramatic stage make-up.
  2. You all wear carefully coiffed wigs.
  3. You have color-coordinated stage outfits.
  4. You use extensive pyrotechnics.
  5. You have an elaborate choreography.
  6. You have a surprising number of props.

Problem

  1. What were the lyrics again?
  2. You forgot to bring your stage outfits and have to improvise.
  3. One of you insists on adding a saxophone solo to the song (none of you plays saxophone).
  4. What was the choreography again?
  5. One of you smashed their instrument last night and you have neither time nor money to buy a new one.
  6. You rely heavily on electronic effects and nobody told you this would be an unplugged show.

3 ‐ Stats

You have two stats. Each starts with 3 points.

Rodent

Use to bite, chew through stuff, run & climb, hide, squeak, and generally do rodent stuff.

Star

Use to do anything not directly related to being a rodent.

4 ‐ Actions

When you act, and the outcome is in doubt, roll a D6.

If you’re using your rodent special-skill or doing something related to your descriptor, roll 2D6 and pick the lowest.

  • If it’s equal to or under the relevant stat, you succeed.
  • If it’s over the stat, you fail.

5 ‐ Changing Stats

Frustration

When the plan fails and you run into difficulty, move one point from Star into Rodent.

Fame

When the plan goes off without a hitch, move one point from Rodent into Star.

Voluntary changes

You can voluntarily move one point from Rodent into Star by doing a flashback scene in which you and the other rodents plan or practice your show in a decrepit basement between moldy rugs and empty bottles.

You can voluntarily move one point of Star into Rodent by gnawing on your instrument in an inopportune moment.

6 ‐ The End

If your Star stat ever reaches 6, you are whisked away into a solo career by an unscrupulous record executive and leave your band behind.

If your Rodent stat ever reaches 6, you drop everything and scurry away into the sewers, never to be seen again.

Part 2 ‐ For the GM

Setting and Scenario

Random tables to set up the adventure (roll 1D6 each)

Contest Organizer

  1. Greedy and unscrupulous
  2. Clueless and exploitable
  3. Maybe too obsessed with guitars
  4. Utterly overwhelmed with paperwork
  5. Expected this to be fun and was disappointed
  6. Nowhere to be found

Contest Location

Adjective
  1. Creepy
  2. Abandoned
  3. Run-down
  4. High tech
  5. Luxurious
  6. Absurdly decorated
Place
  1. Primary school auditorium
  2. Storage facility
  3. Opera house
  4. Convention center
  5. Superstore parking lot
  6. Night club

The Prize

Aside from a recording contract with famous music label Rodent Records, the prize is…
  1. A life supply of delicious vanilla pudding, sponsored by food giant Nestling.
  2. A shiny trophy shaped like a rat with an electric guitar and a raised fist.
  3. A valuable air guitar, formerly used by chinchilla mega-star Dolly Pawton.
  4. Twelve boxes of identical autograph postcards from rock’n’roll icon Nibble Richard.
  5. An interview and photo spread in the prestigious music magazine Rolling Rodents.
  6. An opportunity to be the opening act for the next tour of famous rodent rockers Ratallica.

However...

  1. The only press at the contest is the host of a podcast none of you has ever heard about!
  2. The promised all-day catering is sunflower seeds ‐ two for each of you!
  3. Promotion has gone wrong and the audience was expecting an opera!
  4. Someone has chewed through all of the cables!
  5. The roadies are on strike!
  6. Security is provided by the Lucifurs, a gang of cats!

Rival Bands

Roll 2D8 (or as many as you need).

  1. The Squirelles (rock)
  2. The Exterminators (metal)
  3. Pork & Pines (country)
  4. Doom Beavers (metal)
  5. Minnie and the Whiskers (rockabilly)
  6. Skweex and Sewerz (punk)
  7. The Adorable Fluffs (pop)
  8. The Vermyn (punk)