
~C5-1
^How are things going today?
I know you're still pretty new here, relatively speaking...
I hope you're holding up okay, all things considered...
>I'm totally good!=C5-2-1
>I have my reservations...=C5-2-2

~C5-2-1
^Yeah. I feel surprisingly okay too...
Only recently did I start to question that...
Trying to trace my path that led me here.
Because I'm not entirely sure I recognize myself anymore.
&C5-3

~C5-2-2
^Well, you're not alone.
Lately I've had this sneaking feeling.
Like I don't even recognize myself anymore...
&C5-3

~C5-3
^When I graduated with my PhD I wanted to use that to make a difference... but I also had a lot of student loans.
Then somehow I ended up here. And now my student loans are gone.
And I feel great about that.
&C5-4

~C5-4-1
^And isn't that a horrible thought?
That my maturing and giving up on my dreams go hand-in-hand?
I made it in my career, so now I can give up?
I don't want to be that bitter and cynical person.
&C5-5

~C5-4-2-1
^Sure I did! And now I'm squandering my talents for the sake of luxury.
I don't think there's any other way to put it.
&C5-5

~C5-4-2-2
^Oh I definitely could. But not nearly enough.
If I seriously intended to put my income towards offsetting my negative contributions then I would have left by now anyhow. I can't lie to myself about that.
&C5-5

~C5-4-2
^If that was true I don't know if I'd be here anymore.
Because honestly, it's the money. I get paid well here.
And it's so hard to walk away from that, no matter how I feel.
>But you deserve it, you worked hard to get here.=C5-4-2-1
>You could always use the money for good.=C5-4-2-2

~C5-4
^But I don't know if I'm making a difference here. At least... not a positive one.
But I'm also comfortable here. Maybe this is where I belong. Am I betraying myself?
Or was I just naive and idealistic before?
>You're doing nothing wrong, you're just maturing.=C5-4-1
>You're still in control of your own life.=C5-4-2

~C5-5
^Money changes a person.
Even now in the back of my head I can hear a voice telling me that I deserve everything I can get... that I don't owe anything to anyone else.
&C5-6

~C5-6-1-1
^The thing I find most surprising is how eagerly people without much money will defend the wealth of others.
Really, I don't know how that trick got pulled.
But it does make me sad...
&C5-7

~C5-6-1
^Yeah, but that's a carefully conditioned response that this entire system has worked into you.
It's really difficult to see it for what it is.
&C5-6-1-1

~C5-6-2
^I'm not sure. We're entrenched so deeply in this mindset.
I guess the most important thing is to not let it dictate your life.
Don't let it divide you from others.
See it for for what it is, and make your decisions from there.
&C5-7

~C5-6
^Somewhere along the line I learned that. 
But it's a form of control.
It's why none of us can trust each other. 
What ever happened to community?
>You sound like a hippy communist or something.=C5-6-1
>But what do you suggest?=C5-6-2

~C5-7
^Ugh, not sure how we got into this, but I think I needed to talk about it.
Sorry to waste your break like that... I know time is money.
Anyway, yeah, thanks for getting me through that.
